I have always wondered what it might be like being a recipient of Food Stamps. This morning I finally decided to go to Social Services so I can receive food stamps. My immediate concern was being seen by anyone I know. I wasn’t even going to mention it on my blog until I arrived at Window #1.
They open at 7AM and I made sure I was first in line so I can get in and out without being seen by anyone who could recognize me. Somehow the stigma of being a social dependant was strong enough that I thought it was necessary to take such reputation saving precautions. The visit had the distinct sensation of an unconditional surrender. It wasn’t even a consolation to hear that unusually large numbers are now coming through those doors. Whole families are now seeking help whereas before November of last year, it wasn’t the case.
I didn’t know what to expect and so I walked to Window # 1 and to my absolute surprise and horror I found the sister of my brother’s wife, Patti, behind the glass. I felt my face turn a very deep shade of scarlet red. It was as if I had walked into a pole in broad daylight. The humiliation was so utterly complete.
After the usual pleasantries I sat down to wait for my name to be called. It took about 2 hours before I got the call despite being the first in line. I assumed that an extensive background check was done to make sure I wasn’t trying to defraud the State. Ms. Roxas was a very pleasant lady who had a stern but kind disposition. She gave the impression that she will do anything for her case subject within the confines of the system rules. After the interview, she matter-of-factly told me that my benefits will be $162 per month for 3 months. This month’s prorated amount, which was meant to take me to the end of the month will be $62.00.
“That is incredibly sad”, I told myself. “I can’t even start to think what I can buy with that”. In my hay-day, I could spend that much on a good Sushi Dinner. Then, again that is probably the reason why I’m in such a predicament to begin with. It hit me like a brick – my life is different now.
So the question is why shouldn’t I work instead? Even with a minimum wage, the amount will more than cover my needs. The answer is, I do not have the energy left for work. That’s saying a lot because before this, I could run 8 miles without even needing water to drink. Before this, I can do a half-marathon with only two day’s notice. This month, I am answering two demurrers, two sets of forms interrogatories, I am to be deposed in Los Angeles and have a series of court hearings. I hardly sleep anymore. But the most distressing thing that I have recently experienced were the hunger pangs at night that kept me awake. So, for the time being, I will have to make do with a food budget of $5.40 a day.
I really have to win those cases! It’s simply a must.
