An ounce of pot with that fudge bar, please.

To beat the the competition, a pair of pot dealers decided they were going to distinguish themselves from the rest of the pack by promising to deliver their merchandise discreetly - by hiding in plain sight. In a bold act of deception, a pair of dope pushers tried to execute a pot distribution plan that included selling marijuana out of an Ice Cream Truck.

The criminal team of Jonathan Trahan, 20 yrs old and Hunter Pitre, 19 yrs old were hauled in by deputies of Lafourche Parish Sheriff – Thibodaux LA after concerned citizens complained of narcotic sales being conducted out of an Ice Cream Truck. The initial pat down of Trahan yielded approximately 9 grams of marijuana and a glass pipe. He was charged with possession with intent to distribute and possession of drug paraphernalia. The pat down of Pitre yielded a small amount of marijuana in his socks. He was charged with possession of marijuana.

This is an interesting study in the art of up-selling. In this case, it appears the merchandise will have to be purchased with a drumstick or a fudge bar to pull off the deception. This is reminiscent of a professional shoe salesman up-selling you an extra pair of socks, shoe laces and a shoe shine kit with your new pair of shoes. Because the buyer is a captive market, they can actually deliver the pot inside a gallon of ice cream to try to evade the trained noses of K-9's. That's what they should have done. Instead, they stuffed their merchandise in their socks. Well, obviously, their selling skills leave much to be desired. We can only hope they have an attorney who can sell better, because he or she will have to sell the judge on their innocence.

CLICK TO SEE SHERIFF'S INFO

Valentine's Special: Rich & Nina (February 2011)

It came in the mail just a few days before the 14th of the month. It was in a red velvet envelope with gold letters that said “This is 4 Rich”. Inside was a meticulously prepared invitation for a special Valentine’s Show at the “Oh Baby Club”. He was to do a special 10 song set to get the patrons in the mood for that special day.

Valentine’s Day arrived with little fanfare even with all the excitement I was feeling the last few days leading up to it. I picked up my date, Bellina, right after sunset as we had agreed. We were to spend the early part of the evening at the club and then have dinner at her place where she said she will treat me to a seven-course meal prepared in the stylings of her old country - Italia.

The place was jam-packed when we arrived. Life was never really better for me. I had in my arms the most beautiful woman that I have ever known.

DJ RICH: Happy Valentine’s y’all !! (CROWD: YEAAH!!) I have a set here to get you lovers in the mood for this special day. Let me ask you this. Y’all know ma man Barry White? That guy with the really low voice that if he was talking to you close enough it could knock the wind out of you Barry White? (CROWD: YEAHH !!) We’ll ma man has a little tune he put together in the studios in the 70’s that has made many ladies smile. So, play along with me here ladies. I wanna see all your pearly whites. I want y’all to look at me and smile. (CROWD: YEAHH) That’s what I like. Ain’t nothing prettier than a woman smilin’ at his man. Now that you got me going and since I can see all your pearly whites shinin’ at me all pretty, I might as well give you the man himself. Mr. Barry White ...
CLICK TO HEAR SONG

DJ RICH: You know relationships ain’t always good, right? (CROWD: YEAHHH) And when you love someone, everything get out of whack. I got in a fight with my baby one time ‘coz she thought I was buying way too many chicken at Kaye’s Chicken Emporium. I says, Baby ain’t nothin’ healthier than flamebroiled except she thought I had my eye on another bird - one of them women behind the counter. You can’t blame her ‘coz I was having chicken for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I say’s Baby I wanna be healthy and ain’t nothin’ healthier for me than flame-broiled bird. She didn’t believe me so we had a cooling off. That meant, I couldn’t go there anymore. My Baby wouldn’t talk to me neither. I had to learn to cook chicken in the oven and while this sad time of my life was happening, I had a song for all them rainy days and it sounded like this.
CLICK TO HEAR SONG

DJ Rich: Y’all believe in the magic of a kiss? (CROWD: YEAHHH) My baby got me dialed in, you know. Aint nothin’ about me she can’t heal with her special kiss. One time I was fixing my car and I don’t know how this happened but my fingers got rolled over by my car. Don’t ask me how and what my fingers were doing. It got rolled over by them real fat desert tires. So I started running in the house screaming in pain and my baby took my hand and she kissed it. She told me to count 1 to 10. I did and by the time I got to 10 it was gone. My fingers were still the size of a potato but the pain had gone. I looked in her eye and then she kissed me again. That was all I needed and I was happy as a clam. Guess what I call that kiss ladies? (CROWD:YEAHH) Well, here’s my next performer and she’ll tell you all about it.
CLICK TO HEAR SONG

DJ RICH: OK. Any of you ladies ever met a bullfighter? (CROWD: YEAAHH) One summer I went travelling with my college buddies and drove a Volkswagen Bug all the way to South America. We were in this city having a cold drink and we saw this sign that said, "BULLFIGHTING LESSONS." Since it was the only thing we could read in the whole city, we all went to check it out. Next thing I know, I’m in a bullfighting ring looking like a serious bullfighter - with a Mickey Mouse hat and everything. I was thinking there was going to be big bad bull behind the door. Then comes a thin rinky-dink looking bull. Well, it turns out the bull wasn’t thin at all. It was fit and when that thing took off after me I was frozen and at awe at the same time. He was too quick for me to even move. The next thing I know my face was on a wall and I was eating paint. I got nailed to the wooden planks real bad. When I called my baby, half my face wouldn’t move she thought I was a prank caller. Well, here’s what I really should have done. Have a listen.
CLICK TO HEAR SONG

DJ RICH: Love is great, ain’t it, people? (CROWD:YEAH) There were times in my life when I didn’t even have two pennies to rub together and all I had was my baby. Have you ever felt that before fellas? (CROWD: YEAH) And you wouldn’t tell her that you ain’t got nothin’ to spend on her. But it’s fine with her so long as you treat her just right and it ain’t much to make her happy. One time I just wanted to have a nice dinner with her and I didn’t have any money so I called on my network. I got ma man from the gas station to donate a 32 oz. cup of soda and a couple of bananas. I had ma man from the coffee shop to donate some Cappucino and desert. My friend from the bakery gave me some day-old bread. Then, I went to the grocery and got two $0.21 packets of noodles, two cans of tuna and some eggs that I whipped up before she got there. I placed it all in the nicest China I had. I had some Jack Daniels left over from Christmas and mixed it up with some soda and voila. Oh, and the music? Well here’s what I played - four songs and tell me my baby didn’t fall in love.
CLICK HERE TO HEAR SONG
CLICK HERE TO HEAR SONG
CLICK HERE TO HEAR SONG
CLICK HERE TO HEAR SONG

DJ RICH: What’s the secret of love, people? (CROWD: YEAAHH). How come some people can spend a lifetime together and some can’t even stay in one place for more than a few minutes? It’s two words. Commitment and Compromise. There’s a couple that lives next door from me, John and Rita, and they’ve been together for more than 50 years. I asked Rita what the secret is. And she said that they talk a lot about everythin’ and they never let a problem fester. They solve misunderstandings before they put their heads on their pillows at night. So I asked John what the secret is and he smiled at me. Well son, he said, it’s simple. I’m well trained. It made me smile coz I know exactly what he was talking about. So fellas, if you want to have a good life, you gotta keep yo lady happy. I’ma talk to my Baby ‘coz apparently, she needs to give me some real good trainin’. So for you love birds out there, I have saved the best for last. I’m playin’ these two songs back to back and wish you all a Happy Valentines . Baby this is for you.
CLICK HERE TO HEAR SONG
CLICK HERE TO HEAR SONG

That pretty much set the mood for my evening with Bellina. It was one of the best evenings I've ever had. Thanks to Rich, the music made her feel more than a little of that Amore!

Abe and Darwin's 202nd Birthday

Picture to yourself the chance, ever hanging over you, of your wife and your little children — those objects which nature urges even the slave to call his own — being torn from you and sold like beasts to the first bidder!

Those words may very well have been spoken by Abraham Lincoln who now lives in our collective memory as the president who staunchly championed the cause of anti-slavery. But, in fact, those words were written by none other than Charles Darwin himself.

Abraham Lincoln and Charles Darwin were born on the same exact date, the 12th of February 1809 - Lincoln in Hardin County KY and Darwin in Shrewsbury Engand. Had they been alive today, both would have celebrated their 202nd birthday. The coincidence of their birth begged some sort of comparison such as the one made over the years between Lincoln and Kennedy and the circumstances surrounding their life and death. Unfortunately, I have very limited knowledge of both men and could not write authoritatively about them. So, I searched on the web for things that they had in common and what I found was entirely unexpected. Lincoln's aversion to slavery is very much known to everyone. Darwin’s was not, at least to me. When I read some of the words he wrote about the subject I was caught entirely unaware.

Scholars now argue that Darwin’s authoring of the “Origins of the Species” which postulates man’s origins by natural selection was encouraged by his position on slavery. They claim that his desire to unify all humanity and categorize slaves as “... a man and a brother” may have caused him to search for evidence of a common link to disprove that the slaves were, as slave masters believed, subhuman and entirely from another subspecies. His extensive travels brought him in contact with situations that aroused very strong emotions that later developed into an abolitionist's obsession. Consider what he wrote in his journal:

To this day, if I hear a distant scream, it recalls with painful vividness my feelings, when passing a house near Pernamabuco, I heard the most pitiful moans, and could not but suspect that some poor slave was being tortured, yet knew that I was as powerless as a child even to remonstrate.

Following are more articles about Abraham Lincoln and Charles Darwin.

THE SUNDAY TIMES ARTICLE ON DARWIN
EXCERPTS FROM DARWIN’S JOURNAL
THE LINCOLN FAILURES
LINCOLN - KENNEDY COMPARISON

My piece of the Reagan Revolution

What I would really like to do is to go down in history as the President who made Americans believe in themselves again. (Ronald Reagan)

The ‘80s was a long time ago. The events, the circumstances, the micro-dramas that unfolded in my life during that incredible decade are tidbits of visions from the past blurred by time, the memories of which sometimes require juggling - YouTube clips of popular 80’s bands, rare clips of events and movies from that era. Recently I was watching  ‘Top Gun” on YouTube, the 1986 blockbuster movie and the one single movie that I have seen more times in a theater than any other.

We are drawn to experiences, to people and to things that make us feel good about ourselves. Sometimes we forget what exactly happened at a given moment, but somehow we could still recall how we felt even many years after. President Reagan is one such person - a leader of the highest magnitude gifted with the amazing ability to connect with people like no other politician. So much so that on both presidential contests in the 80’s that he participated in he won by a landslide. In the 1980 election he captured the electoral votes of all except six states (GA, HI, MD, MN, RI and WV) plus DC. In the 1984 re-election bid, he captured the electoral votes of all states except one state (MN) plus DC. His presidency (1981-1989) spanned 8 years and occurred during some of the most exciting and formative years of my life. I came to America first in 1981, returned again in 1983 and spent the rest of the decade trying to blend in with the locals of Southern California. It was, shall we say, my decade of Americanization.

Had he been alive, the Gipper would have celebrated his 100th birthday today, the 6th of February. He left the White House almost 22 years ago, yet in every corner of Washington DC a new generation of leaders still trumpet his revolution of fiscal conservatism - of small, smart and responsible government. Any potential candidate aspiring to be on the GOP ticket must include in his or her agenda the semblance of a Reaganesque economic policy if support from the party is to be expected. The bargain is simple: Leaving the government less money to spend gives politicians less of an opportunity to engage in wasteful spending. In his inaugural speech he criticized the Washington establishment and loudly proclaimed, “The Government is not the solution to our problem. The Government is the problem.”

Often I am asked why President Reagan is my favorite US President. His record of accomplishments while in office is extraordinary. But to pick something that mattered to me personally is actually a no-brainer. He kept me and my family safe. He won the Third World War without firing a single shot. He kept our nation safe and averted a thermo-nuclear conflagration with the former Soviet Union that seemed at the time, all but imminent. Through a combination of diplomacy and “economic black mail” beginning with an arms race, he drove the “Evil Empire” into bankruptcy and eventual collapse. Under that umbrella of safety, I got to play and experience in full living colors my first few years in America.

I was 16 years old when I arrived the second time in this country in 1983. Within a year I was able to purchase a car - a 1984 Mazda GLC - an achievement virtually impossible in my country of origin. I had a car payment of $103.00 per month, a hefty sum when you’re working close to the minimum wage which at the time was about $3.25/hr. For a while I had two jobs. I used to work for a place once called Ben Brown’s Aliso Creek Inn during the day and then I would pick up a shift in the evening at Kentucky Fried Chicken in Laguna Beach. Those two jobs essentially fed my economic engine for about a year or two. I had two of the most important credentials for a young man in those days. I had a car and just enough money for a little bit of fun.

There was a shift in the way the new generation of Americans started enjoying music. The experience was quite electric. MTV was in its infancy and was slowly beginning to take hold in America and the world. That was how I was introduced to some of the talented musicians of that era - with synthesizers and their boisterous fashion. Vinyl records where still the medium of choice. What little money I had left was spent on records, mostly jazz and promptly made into selections recorded on tape for playback in my Blaupunkt and JBL car sound-system. That status symbol of high-fidelity car audio cost me a fortune. One morning I woke up and discovered that my sound system was stolen from my car, to my disbelief and annoyance. It was later replaced but it was never quite the same. Realizing a sound-system could easily be stolen from my car, I skimped on the equipment.

The economics and politics of the time was an abstraction. In the first place I couldn’t even vote as I was not an American citizen - merely a tourist and finally an immigrant. I also had a means to make a living and worried not about unemployment and the GNP. It wasn’t until several years later that I came to realize how remarkable that decade was. Under his tutelage, the country experienced the longest peacetime economic expansion in history. Even the politics was civil than anytime since. President Reagan boasted about the battles he used to have with the Democrats and the House Speaker Tip O’Neill. But at the end of the day he had no hesitations having a drink and trading jokes with any of them. I’m not sure that was the product of the time or something that could be attributed to President Reagan’s personality. I suspect it’s the latter.

The storms that politicians have to weather in their careers are atrocious and quite revolting. The higher the office being sought the more ferocious the onslaught. The spears and arrows and the mean-spirited attacks are all par with the course. Ever at his side and equal to the battles was his fiercely loyal and supportive wife, Nancy. I am fascinated by successful marriages and view their partnership as one of the reasons he was able to achieve such heights. At his funeral in 2004, Former Canadian President Brian Mulroney spoke of a moment they shared while waiting for their wives at the Ottawa Airport:

President Reagan's visit had been important, demanding and successful. Our discussions reflected the international agenda of the times: the nuclear threat posed by the Soviet Union and the missile deployment by NATO;  pressures in the Warsaw Pact; challenges resulting from the Berlin wall and the ongoing separation of Germany; and bi-lateral and hemispheric free trade. President Reagan had spoken to Parliament handling complex files with skill and good humor, strongly impressing his Canadian hosts. And here we were, waiting for our wives.  When their car drove in a moment later, out stepped Nancy and Mila looking like a million bucks.  And as they headed towards us, President Reagan beamed, he threw his arm around my shoulder and he said with a grin, "You know Brian, for two Irishmen we sure married up."

President Reagan will always stand as one of the greatest presidents this country has ever produced. Any great leader leaves for his country and his countrymen a gift of a brighter future. His gift to me will take a whole lifetime to unwrap. It is personal, profound and deeply consequential, bequeathing me with an opportunity to alter the velocity and trajectory of my personal achievements. In 1986 he signed into law an “Immigration Amnesty Act” that allowed me to stay in America, forever altering the course of my future and my descendant's. As a tribute to the man who I deeply respect and admire, I’d like to share with our readers the story of my trip to the US that became the very first chapter of my life here in America - my piece of the Reagan Revolution.

CLICK TO READ MY PLYMOUTH ROCK

Fugitive caught peeing back in the slammer

A man caught relieving himself in public turned out to be a fugitive on the run since 1983. The man first told authorities he was Claude Brooks but turned out to be Edward Nathan Jr., 50, who escaped from a work release program 28 years ago after being convicted for armed robbery.

Just the day before the discovery, Nathan was released by Fulton County FL authorities because of the minor nature of his violation. But after running his fingerprint on the national fingerprint database, the authorities confirmed his true identity. They also discovered that a 27 year old warrant seeking his return to the Florida Department of Corrections was still in place. 

It turns out that after escaping from the work release program he assumed the new identity and did a convincing enough job that he was even hired by the City of Atlanta as an environmental services worker. Asked to comment, a spokesperson for his employer said, "Claude Brooks is currently on administrative leave pending the outcome of an internal investigation. The outcome of this investigation may include penalties up to and including dismissal which may be subject to civil service review."

It goes to show, a fugitive on the run can never let his guard down. In the case of Nathan, it was his pants.

READ RELEASE FROM FL DEPT OF CORR

Robert gets out of the office

An individual living in Southern California without a car lives life severely handicapped. SoCal doesn't have the transportation system that most tourist destinations of the world have - where you can step out to a major street and pick up a bus, a train or even a cab. The Orange County Transit Authority (OCTA), the bus system in the OC, are known for their great service, but it doesn't do anyone any good if the bus does not come around at times that you would like it to. In my area, the bus only comes during peak hours – a few hours in the morning and the afternoon - at an hour's interval. During the weekends or holidays, it does not come at all. So, every time I get invited to leave my little foxhole – the duplex of a building comprising The Neighborhood Cup and the Aliso Viejo Library, I take the opportunity.

Yesterday was sunny and a pleasant day for a ride southbound to the quiet coastal city of San Clemente CA. We made arrangements a few days in advance and at about 9AM, my friend and sometimes client, Joy, picked me up from the Neighborhood Cup - my de facto office. We met each other at the Cup several months ago. Last holiday season, I crafted a “Business Plan” and a “Non-Profit Proposal” to acquire a property for an orphanage that she was trying to establish. This was around the time when my Mac G4 was stolen. She was partly responsible for helping me acquire this HP G62 PC that I now have. She advanced me some of the funds to purchase the computer.

Joy is a trained psychiatric nurse and wanted to ship a crib to Haiti for children that she met while there on a humanitarian trip earlier in the year. We had to go to her storage in San Clemente where the crib was being stored. She made plans for a return trip to Haiti and wanted to send it off before she departed. I offered to help her pack so I can physically remove myself from my cubby hole and get refreshed. I get so cooped up at my usual corner, anchored by all the bags I have to carry, that a trip has a tendency of turning into a welcome self-medication session. The ocean breeze that meets and greets a commuter riding down PCH (Pacific Coast Highway) is so refreshing it's very much like therapy.

The crib needed two large boxes rigged together to contain it. In time we were able to somehow wrap the boxes around the crib, ready for shipment. We wrapped it with bubble wrap and carefully taped the seams together insuring that it does not accidentally bust open while in transit. The last thing you need happen on a humanitarian trip is an accidental garage sale because all your stuff is on the side of the road like an impromptu bazaar. Pleased with the results, off we went to Mission Viejo Mall and the Apple Store for an appointment with what they aptly refer to as “Geniuses”. Joy had some last minute computer-related questions she wanted to resolve before she went off to Haiti where I suspect Apple Geniuses may be in short supply.

I became a reluctant IBM-compatible PC turn-coat out of sheer necessity. I could not purchase a Mac computer to replace my stolen Mac G4 because of the price. I purchased my HP for less than $325 plus tax after the $50 mail-in rebate. So, as she went to the Apple Store, I sat in front of the Microsoft Store to connect to their wireless internet. There would have been a sense of impropriety had I gone to the Apple Store to use their wireless with my HP. At 11AM I got to see a well produced and insightful report from Erin Burnett of CNBC who was covering the events in Egypt – where the besieged dictator is now desperately trying to calm the population. Seemingly overnight their united voice turned to raucous denunciations of his leadership. Fortunately, there have been no reports of bloodshed. I heard he just fired his cabinet, creating this picture in my head of a leader who was also the lowly follower because he was the only one left to hear his orders. It's not a good mental picture to entertain no matter how you look at it. Lucky are those dictators who leave their countries unscathed.

I was back at the library before 3PM and was there until they closed at 9PM. I ended the evening at the Aliso Viejo Barnes & Noble where they close at 11PM. Sometimes, all we really need is a day out of the office. 

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