(DJ RICH IS BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND. Rich’s story continues and this time he is a DJ spinning some 80’s records. If you've missed the previous episodes, click here to read the rest of DJ Rich - Episode #1 and Episode #2)
DJ RICH: “Do we have lady racecar drivers in the house tonight? (Crowd: Yeaahh) Ahaaaaa! That’s right, we’ve got zoomers in the house. Baby, you know I love you and some day I will see the world with you. I’m a DJ and everything but you know I like fast cars? Nice shiny and fast cars like yo’ man – you dig? I ain’t making a lot right now but some day I’ll hit it big and you and I will see some of THE fastest places on earth - where being fast just ain’t fast enough. Sometimes when I don’t see you for a long time, when I work days and nights on straight, I look in the mirror and I see myself looking like a wreck on turn two of Indy – it ain’t pretty. Then, I think about what our future will be and everything’s cool. Coz baby you’re like a hot car. You’ve got all the right sounds; the smooth curves and when you move with them stems of yours you’re like a proto-type coming down the Mulsanne Strait at 200 miles per hour. You step on that baby and you’d better be hanging on. But you’d better be hanging on to me, though. ‘Coz if you ain’t, it’ll break my heart. I wanna take you up to all the gears, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 7. You know what I mean baby – Monacco, Indy, Spa, Neubergring, Le Mans. I’m getting really excited here. So, how ‘bout you check your appointment book and get back to me? ‘Coz right around now, I’m just about ready to go on a real long holiday … with you baby!” CLICK TO SEE VIDEO
DJ RICH: “OOOhhhhweeeee … Isn’t it hot in here? Quick, somebody pour a bucket of real cold water on me. My baby’s gotten me real hot. Why you do me like that, baby? Do we have some dancers in the house tonight? (Crowd: Yeeaahhh!) That’s what I thought. I saw some of you ladies just tearin’ up the dance floor tonight. I like it! I was at the supermarket picking up some flowers for my lady and the fruit guy saw me dancin’ like Fred Astaire. So he asked me, hey what you dancin’ about, ma man? I says, you don’t understand brotha’ I’ve got my baby at home waitin’ for me. After a long night of spinnin’ records ain’t nothing better than being with my baby. She knows how to just make me feel right – from my head to my toes and when it gets pretty steamin’ everything goes. You know what I mean baby? It’s all about the feelin’s and she got me figured out. That’s why I keep coming home to her. And I have got to tell y’all is … what a feeling it has been – hotter than hot. It is so hot that when I think about her, my toes curl up like a curling iron – what up with that, Baby? Well, whatever Voodoo you got going on, I am feeling it baby ….” CLICK TO SEE VIDEO
DJ RICH: “Do we have any waitresses in the house here tonight? (Crowd: Yeaaahhh) Cooool … ‘coz baby, I just can’t wait any more. If I wait any longer I’m gonna end up with a plate of Kung-Pao Chicken with Firecracker Beef – hot, spicy and all the fixin’s – egg rolls and the fortune cookie that tells me you love me even if I ain’t perfect. And for desert. Well, it’s a secret – know what I mean? It’s just between my baby and me. I still have a couple of hours of spinnin’ …. (Crowd: Yeeaaahhh) Yeah, I hear ya. Two more hours of really hot dance music for you all. I love ya and everything but that means I’m two hours away from my baby. That’s just too long even if I take the express train from downtown. You’d better be settin’ up at home, baby. You know those little things you do, the candles, the dinner, the you know what baby. Because I am just telling you, baby It just ain’t right anymore. I just can’t wait anymore …” CLICK TO SEE VIDEO
DJ RICH: “I was looking at the weather on TV this morning and it’s supposed to raining. But how come it’s hot and sunny. I ain’t complaining, just wondering, you see. Ain’t it cool when it’s sunny? (Crowd: Yeaaaah) If I want to make my world sunny, all I got to do is think of my baby and it’s like I landed on some island in the tropics. Someone asked me once, if you were shipwrecked on an island and you can only pick one thing in this universe to have with you, what would it be? My answer is my baby, off course. Coz, she the bomb! She can cook. She can clean the house that I’m going to build out of coconut trees and shells. Man, just to impress her, I’ll make her a treehouse. I’ll call the island “Isla Bella” – meaning beautiful island just like my baby. When I’m doing my thing on the island, like tending to the fish farm, and it’s dinnertime, all she has to do is get up to the top of the treehouse and call me. “Come and get it!!” And you don’t have to ask twice. I’ll be right there. You know what I mean, baby? I know you like it. If I want it sunny ‘round here, all I’ve gots to do is think of you and it’s like I’m walking on sunshine.” CLICK TO SEE VIDEO
DJ RICH: “Baby, you know there comes a time when we got to get out of the apartment we live in and buy a house of our own, right? I’ve been saving up on the down payment. About few months ago, I went to a Realtor around the corner and told him ma plans. I told him how much I’ve been able to save up and he showed me a picture of a doghouse and said “That’s what your down payment can buy.” So I says, what do you mean a doghouse, my baby can’t sleep in a doghouse? That ain’t right. I know you don’t want to live in a doghouse, right baby? So I’ve been saving up my money. I may not have all of it now, but I have plans. I want our crib to be first class like we live in a 5 star hotel – with a swimming pool and a barbeque out back. Yeah. A nice kitchen with nice plates and silverware that say bling-bling, know what I mean baby? I’m going to be talking to an architect and see if he can take payments. And if he says yes, then we can have him draw up the plans. But until then, I’ll just keep on thinking about our house.” CLICK TO SEE VIDEO
DJ RICH: “All right … Did you guys feel that? Did you feel the ground rumblin’. Do you see the smoke comin’? And did you smell that? (smoke from the smoke machine descends). I just heard the news. They said that they’ll be retiring the Space Shuttle (Crowd: Booooooo) Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Do we have any rocket scientists in the house. (Crowd: Yeeeaaah) We do? That’s funny, none of you guys look like scientists to me. Y’all might be dressed smart but y’all really don’t look smart to me. Y’all can’t even figure a way to get your date on your own litlle orbit and you wann tell me that you’re a rocket scientis? Hahahaha … only joking. I’m actually working on my Ph.D right now. Aaahaaa, that’s right. I work as a DJ at night and by day I am a PhD student. I am a Phd Canditate for the subject of love. L-O-V-E, love. You heard it, y’all. I want to know every little thing about my baby. I want to add her, subtract her, divide her and multiply her. I want to do the calculations and figure out her orbit, the angle of trajectory and re-entry. And right now, I am working on a spaceship that I call the USS Reaches and it rhymes with my name Rich ‘coz I want to reach her like no man has ever reached her before. You know what I mean baby? I’m working real hard on it – I mean real hard. So, until I can put you around on my own orbit here, I want to send you on a trip with this here rockit ….” CLICK TO SEE A VIDEO
A NOTE FROM ROBERT: I had a lot of fun developing the DJ Rich Series. As a result, I’ve resolved to do more of these in the future and maybe even spin it off to create a new series dedicated to the 80’s music and music of other decades. So, keep an eye out for that in the future.
DJ RICH: “Do we have lady racecar drivers in the house tonight? (Crowd: Yeaahh) Ahaaaaa! That’s right, we’ve got zoomers in the house. Baby, you know I love you and some day I will see the world with you. I’m a DJ and everything but you know I like fast cars? Nice shiny and fast cars like yo’ man – you dig? I ain’t making a lot right now but some day I’ll hit it big and you and I will see some of THE fastest places on earth - where being fast just ain’t fast enough. Sometimes when I don’t see you for a long time, when I work days and nights on straight, I look in the mirror and I see myself looking like a wreck on turn two of Indy – it ain’t pretty. Then, I think about what our future will be and everything’s cool. Coz baby you’re like a hot car. You’ve got all the right sounds; the smooth curves and when you move with them stems of yours you’re like a proto-type coming down the Mulsanne Strait at 200 miles per hour. You step on that baby and you’d better be hanging on. But you’d better be hanging on to me, though. ‘Coz if you ain’t, it’ll break my heart. I wanna take you up to all the gears, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 7. You know what I mean baby – Monacco, Indy, Spa, Neubergring, Le Mans. I’m getting really excited here. So, how ‘bout you check your appointment book and get back to me? ‘Coz right around now, I’m just about ready to go on a real long holiday … with you baby!” CLICK TO SEE VIDEO
DJ RICH: “OOOhhhhweeeee … Isn’t it hot in here? Quick, somebody pour a bucket of real cold water on me. My baby’s gotten me real hot. Why you do me like that, baby? Do we have some dancers in the house tonight? (Crowd: Yeeaahhh!) That’s what I thought. I saw some of you ladies just tearin’ up the dance floor tonight. I like it! I was at the supermarket picking up some flowers for my lady and the fruit guy saw me dancin’ like Fred Astaire. So he asked me, hey what you dancin’ about, ma man? I says, you don’t understand brotha’ I’ve got my baby at home waitin’ for me. After a long night of spinnin’ records ain’t nothing better than being with my baby. She knows how to just make me feel right – from my head to my toes and when it gets pretty steamin’ everything goes. You know what I mean baby? It’s all about the feelin’s and she got me figured out. That’s why I keep coming home to her. And I have got to tell y’all is … what a feeling it has been – hotter than hot. It is so hot that when I think about her, my toes curl up like a curling iron – what up with that, Baby? Well, whatever Voodoo you got going on, I am feeling it baby ….” CLICK TO SEE VIDEO
DJ RICH: “Do we have any waitresses in the house here tonight? (Crowd: Yeaaahhh) Cooool … ‘coz baby, I just can’t wait any more. If I wait any longer I’m gonna end up with a plate of Kung-Pao Chicken with Firecracker Beef – hot, spicy and all the fixin’s – egg rolls and the fortune cookie that tells me you love me even if I ain’t perfect. And for desert. Well, it’s a secret – know what I mean? It’s just between my baby and me. I still have a couple of hours of spinnin’ …. (Crowd: Yeeaaahhh) Yeah, I hear ya. Two more hours of really hot dance music for you all. I love ya and everything but that means I’m two hours away from my baby. That’s just too long even if I take the express train from downtown. You’d better be settin’ up at home, baby. You know those little things you do, the candles, the dinner, the you know what baby. Because I am just telling you, baby It just ain’t right anymore. I just can’t wait anymore …” CLICK TO SEE VIDEO
DJ RICH: “I was looking at the weather on TV this morning and it’s supposed to raining. But how come it’s hot and sunny. I ain’t complaining, just wondering, you see. Ain’t it cool when it’s sunny? (Crowd: Yeaaaah) If I want to make my world sunny, all I got to do is think of my baby and it’s like I landed on some island in the tropics. Someone asked me once, if you were shipwrecked on an island and you can only pick one thing in this universe to have with you, what would it be? My answer is my baby, off course. Coz, she the bomb! She can cook. She can clean the house that I’m going to build out of coconut trees and shells. Man, just to impress her, I’ll make her a treehouse. I’ll call the island “Isla Bella” – meaning beautiful island just like my baby. When I’m doing my thing on the island, like tending to the fish farm, and it’s dinnertime, all she has to do is get up to the top of the treehouse and call me. “Come and get it!!” And you don’t have to ask twice. I’ll be right there. You know what I mean, baby? I know you like it. If I want it sunny ‘round here, all I’ve gots to do is think of you and it’s like I’m walking on sunshine.” CLICK TO SEE VIDEO
DJ RICH: “Baby, you know there comes a time when we got to get out of the apartment we live in and buy a house of our own, right? I’ve been saving up on the down payment. About few months ago, I went to a Realtor around the corner and told him ma plans. I told him how much I’ve been able to save up and he showed me a picture of a doghouse and said “That’s what your down payment can buy.” So I says, what do you mean a doghouse, my baby can’t sleep in a doghouse? That ain’t right. I know you don’t want to live in a doghouse, right baby? So I’ve been saving up my money. I may not have all of it now, but I have plans. I want our crib to be first class like we live in a 5 star hotel – with a swimming pool and a barbeque out back. Yeah. A nice kitchen with nice plates and silverware that say bling-bling, know what I mean baby? I’m going to be talking to an architect and see if he can take payments. And if he says yes, then we can have him draw up the plans. But until then, I’ll just keep on thinking about our house.” CLICK TO SEE VIDEO
DJ RICH: “All right … Did you guys feel that? Did you feel the ground rumblin’. Do you see the smoke comin’? And did you smell that? (smoke from the smoke machine descends). I just heard the news. They said that they’ll be retiring the Space Shuttle (Crowd: Booooooo) Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Do we have any rocket scientists in the house. (Crowd: Yeeeaaah) We do? That’s funny, none of you guys look like scientists to me. Y’all might be dressed smart but y’all really don’t look smart to me. Y’all can’t even figure a way to get your date on your own litlle orbit and you wann tell me that you’re a rocket scientis? Hahahaha … only joking. I’m actually working on my Ph.D right now. Aaahaaa, that’s right. I work as a DJ at night and by day I am a PhD student. I am a Phd Canditate for the subject of love. L-O-V-E, love. You heard it, y’all. I want to know every little thing about my baby. I want to add her, subtract her, divide her and multiply her. I want to do the calculations and figure out her orbit, the angle of trajectory and re-entry. And right now, I am working on a spaceship that I call the USS Reaches and it rhymes with my name Rich ‘coz I want to reach her like no man has ever reached her before. You know what I mean baby? I’m working real hard on it – I mean real hard. So, until I can put you around on my own orbit here, I want to send you on a trip with this here rockit ….” CLICK TO SEE A VIDEO
A NOTE FROM ROBERT: I had a lot of fun developing the DJ Rich Series. As a result, I’ve resolved to do more of these in the future and maybe even spin it off to create a new series dedicated to the 80’s music and music of other decades. So, keep an eye out for that in the future.
WHY THE FUNNY BLOG SERIES?
